Retardo-Monkey
Author
Rev Bob
original
Source: Wayback Machine
Retardo-Monkey, you'll hear it often and I feel it deserves some clarification. So what is a Retardo-Monkey? The short answer is YOU! You are a Retardo-Monkey, the inbred, mongrel, bastard offspring of primates as a result of evolutionary creationism. I'll take this opportunity to apologize to the primates for implying we're related to them, I'm sure we ruined their property values.
Whah-what? You'll have to read my dissertation on time to understand where my head is on evolutionary creationism, but suffice it to say I believe that the two concepts go hand in hand.
God, as an omni-sentient being lives outside of time, so "time" as we measure it is irrelevant to God; we interpret (Genesis) that God created all this (heaven, earth, animals, people, etc.) in 7 days, evolutionary science has proven that all things evolved over millions of years. To an omni-sentient being, what is the measurement of a day? Apparently, millions of years.
So in the beginning, God made the animals, then while God turned around to work on his next creation everything began evolving. When God comes back the next "day", lo and behold, God finds that there's all sorts of things he hadn't intended, not the least of which are the inbred, not so bright, retarded offspring of monkey's (cavemen); not quite primates anymore. What do you do when you work on something and it's not quite what you wanted, you attempt to fix it. So on the 6th Day God didn't create Man, he fixed the retarded Monkey offspring and called it Man.
We're far from the smartest creature on this planet, in fact we're somewhere around the bottom of the intelligence ladder. We're the only species to kill our own kind for sport or anger, we knowingly and wantonly poison the land, sea, and air, we cheat nature and attempt to live outside the natural order, and we do it all under teh false premise that God meant it to be this way.
You are a Retardo-Monkey..........
Rev Bob
A Sin of Pride
Whah-what? You'll have to read my dissertation on time to understand where my head is on evolutionary creationism, but suffice it to say I believe that the two concepts go hand in hand.
God, as an omni-sentient being lives outside of time, so "time" as we measure it is irrelevant to God; we interpret (Genesis) that God created all this (heaven, earth, animals, people, etc.) in 7 days, evolutionary science has proven that all things evolved over millions of years. To an omni-sentient being, what is the measurement of a day? Apparently, millions of years.
So in the beginning, God made the animals, then while God turned around to work on his next creation everything began evolving. When God comes back the next "day", lo and behold, God finds that there's all sorts of things he hadn't intended, not the least of which are the inbred, not so bright, retarded offspring of monkey's (cavemen); not quite primates anymore. What do you do when you work on something and it's not quite what you wanted, you attempt to fix it. So on the 6th Day God didn't create Man, he fixed the retarded Monkey offspring and called it Man.
We're far from the smartest creature on this planet, in fact we're somewhere around the bottom of the intelligence ladder. We're the only species to kill our own kind for sport or anger, we knowingly and wantonly poison the land, sea, and air, we cheat nature and attempt to live outside the natural order, and we do it all under teh false premise that God meant it to be this way.
You are a Retardo-Monkey..........
Rev Bob
A Sin of Pride